Where do we go from here?
Only you would know…
I am sitting here pondering myself
Because you don’t lend me your mind
How did we get here?
I imagine it’s all my fault
You changed along with me
Now we’re both lost in our hearts
What do you want from me?
I really don’t have a clue
Your feelings elude me
Your heart cold and skewed
When did we fall apart, my love?
Not sure how we reached this demise
I don’t remember losing your heart
Regrets overflow my mind
Why do we do this to each other?
I wish I could take it all back
For my love is always with you
Even on the darkest of our days
Pitter patter in my heart of gold
As it’s stepped on and stomped apart
You’re too broke down to carry me
My head is so full of what’s been said
I cannot fathom each day without you
Your words like a circle in my mind
They just keep going round and round
Will I ever be okay?
via Daily Prompt: Circle
The fear inside screaming out loud
You find yourself in the middle of pain
Looking for that tiny little shroud
Of hope…keeping you steady and sane
Torn up… on the deep of your insides
Causing your heart to feel panicked
Your mind going on roller coaster rides
You find yourself feeling quite manic
Struggling…not able to breathe in and out
The pressure on your shoulders hold you down
Teetering on what is real or what it’s all about
You feel like your under…ready to drown
via Daily Prompt: Panicked
If you have one
You’ve only just begun
You don’t wanna jump the gun
Because we are just beginning the fun
It’s better to have something
Because all of nothing is none
Some of something is some
A lot of many things can be a ton
Time to run!
via Daily Prompt: None
She walked in the door
Dressed in all her splendor
Her look caught his wandering eye
He went to her with candor
She outstretched her hand towards him
A merry meet on her mind
He balanced the soft of her hand at his lips
Bringing an explosion of energy so divine
Her knees went weak
His kiss trailed up her arm
No intentions of stopping him
No need to throw the alarm
A new feeling filling up her heart
Her past brought nothing but tears
She could get used to the treatment
An apprentice to his love for years
via Daily Prompt: Apprentice
via Daily Prompt: Perfume
The smell of your skin
Lingering upon mine
That sweet scent of love
I sniff and reminisce
Your essence like perfume
Bringing memories to illuminate within
Radiating to all my senses
Luring me to breathe you in
Longing for more time with you
I find myself craving your presence
You’re my love drug…
I can’t get enough
Last January I lost my father, and it has been one of the hardest things that I have ever encountered in my life. The feeling that I will never be able to call him, hear his voice, complain about this or that…it’s overwhelming still after a year of him being gone. I think the word I am looking for to describe it is surreal. It still seems like he is there, and then I realize that he is gone. Losing a parent feels like a completely different loss to me than losing a friend or other family member.
Through every loss in your life though, you get something in return…at least that is how I think about it. I got back my ability to write again. Dad was a poet, and he had wisdom well beyond what I had ever imagined growing up. I admired him as my father, but I don’t think I saw him completely until I was sifting through my box of photos and his stuff that I brought back after the funeral. His poems were also in this box. I sat here for hours reading all of them. I learned so much about him that I never knew, and it brought tears to my eyes. As soon as I was done reading, I created this blog, and I have been writing for hours upon hours now…the only rest between was sleep. He inspired me to start writing again because it is what we have always shared with one another.
Growing up I would share my short stories and poems with him, and he would critique them in a caring but efficient way. Sometimes it made me so mad when he would give me direction on one of my stories, but as I look back, I appreciate that criticism. It was hard to take in. I was just a little girl…about 10 years old I would think looking back. I had no idea then that we would share the same passion for creativity and expressiveness.
His pen name was S.A. Kingston, and he was a brilliant poet and artist of words. He was my Dad, and I miss him dearly. I am thankful I have his poems to look back on and reflect on who he was because it is helping me find myself again.
So, here I am, Dad. I am writing again, and it feels really good. Thank you for giving me the inspiration to feel through my words again and share my creativity with the world. You are my light in the window of my soul. I will keep the candle burning for you.