October 20 and 21 Word Challenges – 2021

I ran behind on all the things I wanted to do yesterday due to errands and a meeting, so yesterday was productive to say the least. With that said, I will be combining some of my challenges from yesterday. Also, please join all of us that do these word challenges by clicking on the links within the creations made from the words. My pingback links open in a new window, unless I forget the tick the button to make it open in a new tab. This way you don’t lose your place *smiles*

This will be the start of a story or a chapter of one I have already started. I hope you all enjoy it!


Photo by Alice Aksenova on Pexels.com

A day came when she decided to take a trip and make it an adventure. There was a place Meredith would always go to explore, and she figured today was a great day to take a break, especially since she had worked for 10 consecutive days straight on a difficult legal case. She needed a break, and it would be worth it to get some air in her face and some nature in her bones. An adventure would satisfy her exhaustion from a very long week and a half. She needed to hear the melody of the trees rubbing together with nature singing to her soul. She knew just where to go, and it was about time she got back to her happy place.

She grabbed an apple from the counter along with her overnight bag and her cell phone, and through the door she went to head out to her secret place. She had always found some euphoria in that location, and she never told a soul where she would disappear to, even though her friends would always ask where it was or if they could go with her. It was a noble attempt for them to always be persistent to share time with her. The problem was that she was liking the fact that she could have a place that no one could invade or take over, and she enjoyed that it bothered them that they could not find her. As that thought crossed her mind, she opened the trunk and used her hand to jam her bag into the trunk, shut it, and was on her way.

Everyone should have that one place that set them free from the big world, and her place was like nothing she had ever seen before when she found it. This was not an open field full of flowers but rather a darkness that was so beautiful that it overwhelmed her to a point of pure elation. As she approached the entrance to the forest, her happiness grew immensely. The feeling was effectual to what she wanted to accomplish by taking this hiatus away from the real world.

As she drove down the narrow path, the trees began to encapsulate her SUV. It was a little more overgrown than she remembered, but the path to her hiding place was still intact. She drove until she could no longer safely navigate the path, and then she went to foot, leaving her vehicle behind. She knew there would come a point to where she would have to walk to her spot, but it did seem like it was sooner than she was used to.

She grabbed her bag, walking stick, and some other essentials and headed out on her adventure through the thick layer of trees and vegetation until she reached the rickety little bridge that she had built years ago when she first found her secret hiding place. It was in pretty bad shape, but it lead to a hollow in the hillside where she had her lanterns and supplies stashed for her adventures. She had to make haste to the other side of the bridge before it got dark, so she navigated the unstable bridge.

She was pretty agile when it came to climbing and navigating through dangerous areas, and this was not any different for her. The bridge was made of two by fours and strong rope, but some of the planks were missing. She just had to step carefully, with a little shirk of a side-step from time to time when she would slip a little. She made it across with an unmistaken ease and decided to have a little bite to eat before she entered the hollow.

As she nibbled on the apple she brought from home, she listened to the sounds of the forest. She was so hungry that it almost made her regurgitate a little bit of stomach acid due to the stress of crossing the bridge. Her stomach was rumbling loud enough to wake the dead, but the forest was a mixture of sounds. It was so quiet at times, but other times the animals were so loud along with the wrestling of leaves on the trees. She was leaned up against one of the biggest trees she had ever seen in this forest to have her bite, and it was very old with a gnarl that almost sent it sideways. It was a bit creepy looking, but she loved the ancient look of the tree. She thought to herself for a moment that it would probably have seen more changes than she could ever imagine. Time…a mysterious thing it was, she thought, as she pushed up off the tree root and carried on to the entrance of the hollow hillside.

A handmade ladder was seated at the opening in the rocks of the hillside, and it also had taken some wear and tear from its environment. She gave the ladder a wiggle to test the durability…”It’s good. I got this.”, as she stepped off onto the first step down with her flashlight gripped by her mouth. The ladder seemed to be more stable than the bridge as she approached each dark step down, but the last step broke when she reached the end of the tunnel.

She shined her light to her supplies, which were still in the spot she left them, and she lit the lantern with the matches from her satchel. As the cave lit up, her eyes could not believe what she saw before her…

© E.M. Kingston

Anxious Heartbreak

Her upper lip quivered as she felt her heart being ripped from her chest.

The world she had created was being swallowed up by the fissure of mistakes of her past.

One conversation would change life back to a time when she was unstable and broken.

Her heartbreak was matching the anxiousness she was feeling in her soul as she lost everything again.

She had no understanding how it is always so easy for people to walk out of her life.

Except they do that all the time, and it is always when her life is one huge bungle of failure.

She’s running out of lives to live…

xoxo, E.M.

E.M.’s Photo Challenge #386

This is the first time using this Photo Challenge prompt from Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, and I am really excited to try it. I am going to mix the word challenges in this creation, and I hope you all enjoy it.

Photo Credit: Caters

He looks down at the dirty streets filled with cars and people, and he wonders what it would feel like to fall. Tears fill his eyes in a flood of emotion, and he runs his fingers along the underside of groovy edges on the cement balcony upon which he sits while peeking over the edge of his knees. He feels like his life is an allusion of what he should be, and the sounds coming from below are bloodcurdling, loud, and triggering.

He is too scared to push off forward to his demise, and he hopes someone will come to save him from himself. He wants to look back but can only look down. His face flushes with fear, and his ears feel as hot as the sun in the desert.

Then it happened. He no longer felt like he was on fire. He feels divine intervention holding onto him as his heart races, causing a shiver in his bones.

“I can’t do this”, he says to himself. He slowly backs his bottom to where he can put each leg in a safe place and exits his looming demise.

“I have too much life to live to go out like this. Thank you, God!”

He exits the balcony, grabs a bottle of water, and walks out the door to never go back again.

What E.M. Sees #103

This is my first #WDYS prompt, and I am excited to do this challenge. I tend to trail on the dark side a bit because of the things that go on in my life, and I hope you all can relate with what I see.

Here is the photo prompt:

Image credit; Jovan Vasiljević

What I see is someone’s hard work and skill resting peacefully in a basket. I see them waking up at the break of dawn to start the day to put breakfast on the table. Each of the donuts are the same taste, but they are different sizes and coated in their own perfection. Each one will appeal to one certain person that picks one. Even though they all probably taste the same, one person will love each one differently because they touch each of those people in they’re own way.

Like choosing the people in our lives, these donuts will be chosen according to which one looks like they are what is best for the person wishing to consume it. I’m not saying that we consume people per se. I am just saying that we absorb the people around us, some ways good and some bad. After they are gone, do we miss them though or want another one?

xoxo, E.M.

Me vs Me

Heavy breath from my lips
Used to be light and fluffy
My thoughts now so radioactive
Toxic to my well-being
A tide of events breaks my heart
Into pieces of what used to be me
My anxiety is a man-eater, except I’m female
Raging with it’s own hormones and darkness
It’s ludicrious how much I live there
Inside of myself, hating this version
Of who I have become from who I was
This person a malapert edition of failure
I straddle my emotions like a horse
Trying to guide my essence, but being overcome
I need to find out who I am again…

xoxo, E.M.

This is my submission for the word challenges from Daily Spur, Fandango, Ragtag, My Vivid Blog, Word of the Day Challenge, and Your Daily Word Prompt.

Waking Up: Life with E.M.

From the time I wake up, I struggle with even wanting to get out of bed. The problem is that I really want my first cigarette of the day, but my body wants to stay in bed to avoid what is waiting outside. I do it though. I rise up and throw my comfortable covers to the side and allow myself to take the steps needed to go smoke. Then I play a few games on my phone, and then I write down all of my feelings from the time I wake up.

I have a legal pad that I doodle my thoughts upon. I never really read them until I feel like I can do something with them though. I use them when I need to heal and express. This week I have wrote more on paper than I have written on my blog, but sometimes I feel like, “Who wants to read sadness all of the time?” There is so much sadness and feeling pity for my situation.

Mental illness is terrible. I think I would much rather have the flu because you can recover from it. I wonder sometimes if I will ever find my version of happy or feel free of my own insecurities and inner suffering. The thoughts inside of my head are crucial, and they really mess me up. I am a human sponge when it comes to people around me, and I feel everything. I try to ground myself to not feel their energy, but when everyone is mad at you all of the time for speaking your own truth…it’s heartbreaking.

I wish I could just shut of my empath skills, like for real. I am sick of feeling everyone’s disdain for their own lives that they project onto mine. I am tired of not being able to tell people when they upset me or disrespect me. I keep my mouth shut 9 times out of 10 because I hate confrontation and anger. I put on my smile, forget that they just hurt me, and move on with life because I am the only one around this house that is not entitled to have feelings or speak out when someone has made me feel a certain way.

I hate that I feel stuck and feel conflicted on what to do. I am tired of fighting to belong somewhere. I have struggled with that my entire life…never fitting in. I have always been different and seen the world different than other people. I think it has some aspects to do with having a few blessings of abilities, and the other part of it is that I am not an evil person. I wish I could treat people like they treat me and talk to me.

Honestly, I have to wake up and keep going because my pain gives me power, and I refuse to let them win. I refuse to let people continue to break me. It’s time to get help. It was the worst day today, so it can only go up from here… right?

xoxo, E.M.

Voices: E.M.’s First Sestina

I got a little preoccupied trying a new style of poetry, so I have not posted since Friday. One of my fellow writers, revivedwriter, did a Sestina, and it was so cool that I wanted to try it myself. It’s a very difficult poetry style, and it really challenged me. With that said, I am using the word challenges from October 1st and October 2nd to write the Sestina.

The word challenges for October 1 & 2 were as follows:

Now, let’s continue with Voices…

Brief moments of peace, I yearn to have some quiet
Every feeling inside of me, so raw and extreme
I sit still, listening to an empty room become loud
With the voices jabbering inside of my head
My footsteps are like those of a ghoul sneaking by me
These walls hold my pain, my declivity, and my soul

The fear I am sick with consumes my aching soul
Change has me on eggshells, “be very quiet!”
The figment in my imagination, the pain eats at me
All of my senses intensified, it’s to an extreme
My failure rings out like a bell inside of my head
As I cannot quiet my suffering that screams loud

Respect for my situation is truth, but still I cry loud
As the wave of blame falls upon my tired soul
I carry everything…so heavy…on my shoulders and head
No tight hugs to hold me when the darkness becomes quiet
A rarity is the one good feeling, all it takes to heal me

A plethora of emotions come close and swallow me
The feeling of drowning when the voices get too loud
Out of control thoughts, no longer mild, only extreme
They are picking and tearing into this old tired soul
Stop! Why can you not be quiet?
This is too much…get out of my head!

My nerves are dancing and standing intrinsic to my head
As they feel of life, the decay of my essence threatens me
They refuse to sit down, dancing about and not quiet
The more I kick and scream, the dancing is getting so loud
This illness is sickening and overwhelming everything about me
Do you hear me? I am yelling at you with my voice loud!
Only to find out I am not loud at all…It’s quiet.

xoxo, E.M.

Sideways Conundrums – Day 3 and 4

So…back in 2017, I moved here. I did not really want to upend my life and live on someone else’s terms. I owned my land and my house. Here I would be living under the roof with the same woman that nailed me down to the floor and beat me in the back until I could not walk well before I was even in my teens. The deciding factor was that she told me I would be safe here, so I trusted her. People change right? Pfft. That’s complete bullshit…sometimes the change is for the worse.

The psychoticism I’ve encountered since moving here has been nonstop since May of 2018, but I was and still am in no position to stand up for myself. I started therapy to try to get me through all of the changes happening in my life. I tried to stay to myself. I kept my mouth shut and my eyes open. Until the day I could no longer be someone’s speedbag that they just punching over and over and over again, in the literal sense…not the physical. There was one time she got physical with her abuse during a tantrum where she was tossing lawn furniture, but it was after I threw a small, square, under a pound Kleenex box at her rear end to make her stop ruining stuff. Her tantrum trigger me and scare me.

I don’t like anger, and I hate confrontation, mostly because I am usually the one who will pop someone in the mouth first for the disrespect. I never liked being an angry person, and I got help with my anger. It’s just one of the things that go along with having a broken brain…Sidetracked again, my bad.

Long story short, I worked really hard to try to build a life for myself here and failed. Some of it was my fault, and some was the people around me and their actions. I am moving back to Arkansas…a place I never wanted to call home again because I felt like I was born to live in California. It’s scary. It’s intimidating. I’m not okay…but I’m here.

I have spent over 24 hours in manic depression, severe anxiety, and feeling of hopelessness. My head is pounding. My self-esteem is in the toilet with my pride, and I am fucking tired. I am tired of fighting to feel like a human being that is not a complete waste of time and space. It’s been a bad Day 3 and 4 to say the least.

Rewind: Backwards I Go

As per usual, I will be combining my word of the day challenges into one post with a new poetry style, which today will be A L’arora. It is another Laura Lamarca style, and consists of four 8-line stanzas without a syllabic restriction. The 6th and 8th line will be the only rhymes.

The word challenges today are bowl from Daily Spur, late from Fandango, amenable from Ragtag, and clueless from WOTD via Cyanny.

This post is inspired by last night’s events with the toxic ones. I will be moving soon. I still don’t know how I feel about it. I may be going backwards.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I’m trying to move on but keep climbing to be pushed down
Like running up a human-sized bowl with slippers on my feet
Slipping, I struggle and wriggle and beg and plead unsuccessfully
I have become amenable to your behavior, your ways, and your abuse
My insides are screaming for safety, quality, and peace
To feel the essence of my own being sounds of sanctity and bliss

Just let me be and leave me alone…let me live
You think you have not erred…dumbfound and clueless

It’s too late to stop what you put into motion
I am turning my back, walking away, gone soon
In my eyes and heart, you’ll no longer exist
A stranger with no sister, no nieces, no great niece
Your family is leaving you and lacking one tear on our face
Your own doing, losing us all this way

All I wanted is to breath, to excel, and be myself
Your control, anger, and denial turned brightness gray

Calling me out of my name that came from my birth
Pushing and yelling, your triggered my soul
Pain and suffering was not ever the master plan of my move
Dumbed out here like garbage, I needed a light for my path
I was met with your darkness, exploits, and disdain

I have to save me now from the wrath of your illness
Conversations and a relationship are dead, I refrain

You broke me from the innermost part of who I could be tomorrow
Money is not what makes this world spin upon it’s axis
Only controls people to make them as puppets of their masters
All I wanted is to be who I am, successful and benevolent
You wanted mirror-image, to mold me as an imposter

All of this sorrow, so unneeded, unnecessary, and preventable
You can check my name off of your “people to abuse” roster

xoxo, E.M.