My Heart and Mind Shatter

Restoration – Image by KL Caley

Like this old beaten house, my heart and mind are full of grief and loss. Long story short…My daughter duped me and took away everyone in one swish of her razor tongue. All I ever wanted was for my kids was for them to be loved, happy, and have a new mom with a new look on life. It’s clear that they just want me to be the bad guy, so I am going to mourn in the way that I know how. I don’t want to answer a lot of questions. I just need to feel this in order to not break down again.

Place – My Mind

Emotion – Mourning

Adjective – Misunderstood

Verb – Mirrored

My animal – Mockingbird

My essenceMisery.


My mind is tangled and weaved in sorrow.

I feel like an old house, abandoned and forgotten.

The windows of my soul are broken, unrepairable.

My luster left with her smile, her laugh, her everything.

I am mourning the loss of my mockingbird baby.

I can only hope you find a bypass to find me again.

The old door slammed in my face without reason.

I’m always misunderstood with my past being mirrored.

A zeitgeist of a life gone in the past reconstructs again.

It rushes back to me with languish as I decay inside.

My heart is being stonewashed over the fires of hell and beyond.

As it hangs, I see it dangling above me in the like a fire-traced halo.

There is nothing terrific to feel as my soul bends like an arch of pain.

The opalescence that glimmered in my eyes worldwide, now fades to black.

My lights diminish and become dim as I ask myself “why?”

Why did I let you back in?

Why did you hurt me again?

Why do I deserve this?

I loved you, you enjoy it, and I don’t.


Dessa Boo,

My princess! Gigi misses you, loves you, and hopes you are doing alright. I worry about you, and I will be here waiting for you every day. Your smile lingers in my heart, and your laugh fills my soul. Stay strong and beautiful, my little mockingbird. Never let your mommy forget that Gigi was your hero and that you loved me. Keep that chin up, and if you ever need me, I am a phone call away. I love you more than words can say.

xoxo,

Gigi


Gigi’s Dessa Boo Baby 🌈💟🌈

25 thoughts on “My Heart and Mind Shatter

    1. I’ve never been able to do anything right for them. If I ever would have treated my momma the way I am treated, I would have been disowned and probably beaten. I have not been a perfect mom, as none of us are, but I am better than I am given credit for. So sad that you can relate, Gypsie.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m so sorry you lost her so young. My youngest daughter is 22, and she seems perfectly fine with losing me 😦 My oldest daughter too…

      The sad thing is that Dessa will suffer from the choices of her mother. They both had people that loved them so much.

      Liked by 1 person

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